Aprils Fool.

Every Friday, Santas Elves* get together (hey, it’s post season, what else are they gonna do) and create a list of questions called the *Friday Five*. I’m searching for things non-Middle East to think about right now, so here’s my inaugural entry to the F5.

  1. If you could eat dinner with and “get to know” one famous person (living or dead), who would you choose? President Ronald Regan; I wanna know more about that Iran/Contra deal. Seems we lost some money in the exchange and I want to figure out how to get it back so I can save Social Security.

  2. Has the death of a famous person ever had an effect on you? Who was it and how did you feel? When William Shatner died, I died along with him. Now he’s traveling ahead warp factor 10. Oh captain … my captain.

  3. If you could be a famous person for 24 hours, who would you choose? King of France. Those backwards people need to start speaking more English. Royale with Cheese, pfftt. Who are they kidding?!

  4. Do people ever tell you that you look like someone famous? All the time. People are always asking me if I’m Gary Coleman. Do you have any idea how annoying people get when they hound you to say, “What’chu talkin about Willis”?

  5. Have you ever met anyone famous? Like I said, people think I’m Gary, so I get to hang out with a lots of famous people. The other night I went to Todd Bridges’ house and played xBox all night until he ran out of Salsa Verde Doritos. He’s pretty fly.

  • Friday Five is actually the creation of a girl named Heather who has a really cool thing going over at Smattering.