Flight Cancelled.

The Terminal is the type of movie (if you can call it that) I would expect to see from a second year film student. The kind of film that is based so heavily on Hollywood formula that it almost forgets to finish telling the story.

It’s craptastic and sucktacular.

This movie is plagued by way too many subplots — to the point that even the main plot is dumbed down to becoming just another subplot and one that doesn’t really provide any resolution. In fact, none of them do. I still don’t know why half of the plot-lines were even included in the movie.

For instance, the love interest between the foreigner and the stewardess never amounts to anything considering it was advertised as a part of the major plot in the movie. A good hour of spent on the love plot and yet in the end neither of the characters comes away having learned anything, or grown from the experience — they don’t even end up together.

I counted at least six other sub-plots with similar train wreck transitions.

The Terminal happens to also be the worlds longest cinematic commercial. Product and logo shots were constantly forced throughout the movie while brand names were worked into the script. The audience is continuously hammered over and over again with so much blatant advertising that it shares just as much screen time as just another subplot.

Be prepared to indoctrinate your brain into using the following brands: CNN, Borders, Starbucks, Swatch, United Airlines, Baja Fresh, Burger King, Hugo Boss, Baskin Robins, Discovery Channel Store, Dr. Pepper, Brookstone, Panda Express, Ramada Inn, Planters Peanuts, and Motorola.

There were a few more but it’s hard to recall this morning with my Spielberg/Hanks Eleven Buck Chuck hangover.

I don’t like to use this space to review products but after my experience at the movies last night, I needed to vent a little and hopefully save you from spending $11 per person to see what should have been another entertaining movie from Hollywoods cutest actor/director couple.

Instead The Terminal is a mish-mash of poor directing, editing, photography and studio greed (note that I did not mention acting) — the kind of “movie” that usually goes directly to video.