Airbag Industries

Pets.

American presidents have always had a pet project at some point during their administration. It’s a gimmie that the citizenry afford but it usually comes with one consequence for both the residing leader and the people of the United States.

Nixon’s pet project involved breaking into the Watergate Hotel to gain intelligence information on his opponents election strategy. The investigation costs the American tax payers through the nose but eventually Dick left Washington in disgrace.

President Regan really wanted to put “laser” guns in space. We spent a whole lot of cash on this idea but eventually Micheal Gorbachev talked him out of it; but not until we had spent a nice pile of money learning, researching, and prototyping these “lasers”.

William Jefferson Clinton settled for having just a pet (no project) and we all know how that went. That year I paid $11,415 dollars of the $50 million dollar Star Report myself – someone else must have paid the tip. Clinton ended up with a nice office in Harlem.

So if President Bush really, really wants to invade Iraq then I say Damned the Torpedoes, Tora Tora Tora, Hi Ho Silver! This is your gimmie, and you are only allowed one.

However, we are trying to reduce government spending — Bush campaigned on this remember? So the gimmie program will now require that a president may only spend equal to or less than the gimmie of the previous administration.

That brings the total budget for Operation Desert Best Served Cold to $50 million. I don’t know what kind of party the Department of Defense was planning for $200 Billion but may I suggest going with a sheet cake instead of the tiered.