Airbag Industries

Spacely.

I’ve been using Web 2.0 for, oh, about eighteen months now (after pestering a few key people I managed to get into the beta test) and I’ve jotted down a few thoughts and impressions.

I think developers mostly love this “web upgrade” because all they have to do is copy 37signals’ user-interface (which is little more than adding a background color to boxes) and get to put a check-mark next to the word “graphic design” under the application features list.

Everyone talks about Web 2.0 being faster but I don’t think I’ve ever filled out so many damn forms in my life. To get into the alpha version of a website I have to sign up for some propaganda newsletter. Meanwhile beta sites require that I create a profile before I get get to any content. As I recall in Web 1.0 there was a lot more clicking, less typing.

Where are the apps for deporting illegal immigrants? Eighteen months on Web 2.0 and no one has thought of this? Seems like the killer app for half the US population that no one has thought of. Maybe that’s for the best but I see dollar signs in the red states. Come on someone, Get Real already.

I used to design and make web sites. Now I have to tell people that I design and make web apps otherwise they look at me like I’m a C-average communications major newly graduated from some backwoods community college. Pity the word sites has a better ring to it and app rhymes with crap.

Silly people think Web 2.0 is all about innovation and software that helps people hack their lives for the better but I say it’s mostly about new forms of advertising — it’s everywhere. In the olden times of Web 1.0 we used to fight the proliferation of online advertising but now it’s an excepted form of generating side-income and somehow you’re an idiot if Google Ads aren’t displayed across your site like a newly crowned homecoming queen proudly wears a sash.

There’s so much to subscribe to in Web 2.0: site news, blogs, articles, comments, update notices, podcasts, and vidcasts. I never have to bother going to an actual web site, ever. It all comes to me. With all these delivery systems I wonder if we’ll ever bother having a World Wide Web 3.0. I guess we’ll have to call it something else, like Subscriptions 3.0 or Inbox 3.0 or Hyperlinks Suck 3.0.

What happened to Flash? I was surprised that Macromedia seems to have missed the boat on Web 2.0 like they did in Web 1.0. Sure it’s used for promotions and advertising but nothing past that really. I guess it’s great technology for making pretty headlines in Web 2.0 (thanks Mike Davidson!). I guess you could really say that Flash is the Photoshop of the Internet; only five percent of it’s functionality is used by ninety-nine percent of it’s users. And to think they gave Howard Hughes such a hard time for building the Spruce Goose. Tsk, tsk.

Why do I still have to check email in Web 2.0? I would have thought by now that people could send and receive telepathic messages but sadly I don’t even see an alpha version that I can fill out form and get access to. Lame.

Speaking of advancements in human kind…still no hover cars. When I saw that an application was being created for me to check the current market price for whole roasted chickens I thought flying cards were going to be the next on the list. I bet George Jetson rolls in his grave every time a Basecamp account is created because we’re still clinging to the Earth and have to clean up after ourselves without the aid of robots.