The other day I was in a coffee shop, standing near the counter waiting for the delivery of my iced latte. A retired, older, lady walks in, places her order and turned my way, stopping for second and then approached with a smirk. She spoke with a heavy accent, “What are you doing here?”

I think she’s talking to me but I check, yep, no one for 20ft. in all directions. I point to myself, “Who, me?”

Her smirk turns into a grin, “Yes, what are you doing here?”

“I’m waiting for my latte.”, in the the most ‘duh!’ attitude I can muster. Now I’m totally confused. Half of me thinks she’s just lonely and needs to interact with someone while the other half just keeps repeating, “walk away, walk away slowly and whats taking so long with that drink? Its just two shots of espresso and cold milk!”

But she continues, stepping closer, “No, you have red hair, what are you doing here in California?”

“I … I live here?!” Wah? What the hell does red hair have anything… I could have roasted the beans myself by now, where’s my drink?

“You can’t live here, you have fair skin. You’ll get cancer.”

And the Sun is going supernova in 3 billion years, what’s the point? “Oh. Well, where are you from?”

“Norway, but I now live in Pomona.”

This only leaves me with more puzzled, but before I could think of a polite response/question, the barista calls out, “Iced latte for Greg.” Taking my que I exit coffee shop left and away from a most bizarre conversation I have ever had.